by Ian Hill
[Transcript]
Max: Oooeeee there’s daddio scuba diving
Max: What’s that?
Max: I don’t know what that is? *blanket confusion*
Max: What is that? *seriously questioning reality*
Max: Ooooo lookatdatlittlecute fish
Max: Loootat dat lil fish *I’d definitely pet that fish*
Max: There’s all the bottom
Pete: Ah! *I’m overwhelmed by all of this*
Max: Oooooooh
Max: Where are all those guys doin *can I come?*
Pete: I’m nervous!
Paula (Nana): It’s an angel fish *let’s bring order to chaos here…*
Max: Where’s he going?
Max: What is that?
Paula (Nana): It’s a flounder
Max: Why? *existential thoughts*
Max: Where’s he lookin for?
Max: What’s he lookin for?
Paula (Nana): They’re mostly all lookin for something to eat.
Max: Huh? *can’t compute*
Pete: Pshessh *I’m freaking out right now*
Max: That where you saw a fish underwater *let’s stick to the facts*
Paula (Nana): That’s a parrot fish.
Max: Yeh *duh*
Max: Didjuseedat?
Pete: Eaah! *I will need a new diaper after this*
Max: Oh! Dat’s a shark down in the bottom *wonder what he’s doing down there*
Pete: eh eh eh ahhhhh *please turn this off*
Max: Down on the bottom *he’s down there alright*
Pete: Eyebrow! Praaah! *this is a cry for help*
Me: *tears*
Pete: Hyah! *that’ll show him!*
Max: Lookat all those little fish
Max: Lookat all those little fish - look at all dos fish *do you see them?*
Pete: Waaah Wookatfush downin whakey wi fish *I do, I do see them*
Max: So many! *but wait, what’s missing?*
Max: Where’s the Trumpet fish?
Pete: Iwanwook at dat one! *I need that one in my hand right now*
Max: Wheres-is dat uncle Wes?
Me: No that’s your mommy.
Max: Why? *Can’t that just be Uncle Wes? Why does that have to be mommy?*
Pete: Ah Ah *geeking*
Max: Oh, you saw a turtle!
Pete: Ah wook at turtle! *do you see it though?*
Max: eyis why eyis dat fer cutting, whatre, whatisda pointy thing for? *I’m steering clear of that thingamajig*
Me: It’s for stingin.
Max: Huh? Why? *why would any animal on this planet need a pointy thing for stinging?*
Paula (Nana): It’s a stingray.
Max: Why? *that did not answer the question….*
Max: oh, oh there’s emrgh there’s little stingray *I’ve seen this bugger before, got your number you sneaky devil*
Paula (Nana): Did you like it there?
Max: hmm? *come again?*
Paula (Nana): Did you like it there?
Max: Is that Turks and Caicos?
Paula (Nana): mmhm
Ian Hill is an adventure athlete who found a camera. Day-to-day, he's cofounder of a medtech startup, but whenever the opportunity presents itself, he's climbing, mountain biking, snowboarding, or just somewhere in the middle-of-nowhere shooting photos and videos.
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